Saturday, June 13, 2009

Alcatraz or NIMBY

Nancy Pelosi - our water-boarding, flip-flopping Speaker of the House - needs to rise to the occasion of her own making and offer up Alcatraz Island as the new home for all 241 inmates in GuantanamoBay. If Sarah Palin can see Russia from her Alaskan front porch, why can't Pelosi enjoy her morning herbal tea whilst watching the mist waft in amongst the cells of some of the world's most dangerous terrorists and murderers?

The San Francisco of Alice B. Toklas, Allen Ginsberg and Harvey Milk should seize the opportunity to blaze yet another "progressive" trail for the rest of the country. By putting their (substantial) monies where their (ever-moving) mouths are, Pelosi and her constituents can extend the city's famous embrace of 'alternative lifestyles' to the most nefarious enemies of our most precious union. Inmates' hatreds for Jews, gays, and infidels of all stripes could be soothed by a daily (and mandatory) regimen of yoga, taught by burka-clad instructors. Their bloodlust could be tackled by the unique prescriptions of homeopaths and the meditative effects of the latest in multi-cultural fusion, Koran chant.

Ponder for a moment history's mostly forgotten lessons. During the Second World War - aka the 'Good War' - we interned over 400,000 prisoners of war right here in the United States, with another 1.6 million housed elsewhere. Imagine a former-day Pelosi or the ACLU prevailing on the Senate, Congress and U.S. Court system to extend our substantial and just laws and protections to these two million POWs. Hitler and the Japanese might not have needed to prosecute the war after all: our justice system would have ground to a debilitating halt, and the costs would have put us in permanent penury. Habeas corpus and the (then) unavailability of significant evidence would have ensured most, if not all, a quick pass to "GO." Even if most were deported, imagine the self-destructive time bomb represented by the release of even a fraction of these two-million avowed Nazis and otherwise fascistic soldiers into the United States of America.

We are still fighting a vicious war - roughly 8,000 Americans have died, 3,000 on September 11th and 5,000 of our bravest since. Hitler's war ended when we bombed Dresden, invaded Germany and buried his totalitarian regime; the Japanese surrender required history's only use of a nuclear weapon. Unfortunately, Al Qaeda doesn't leave a return address and this war may drag on for years - even decades. History has shown us valid, reasonable and successful rules of engagement. We deny them at our peril.

Published on
Published on NewsBlaze
Published on The Absurd Report


Malcolm Hall said...

Leslie: I think you have a good point, but maybe I have misunderstood you. You're probably joking. But I think that the prisons of the US should take the Gitmo prisoners.
It's embarassing to see both libral and conservative governors taking a NIMBY stance. Do we think the prisoners are some sort of superhumans that will fly over the walls? Are we afraid of demonstrations?
Put them all in max security and keep them there until the war is over. Since the old fashioned notion of "parole" -- meaning a promise not to fight again -- means nothing to these fanatics, then let them rot.

I think our prisons and prisoners will be able to handle these criminals. Let them bunk with Charlie Manson. Let them discuss politics with the Unibomber.

Howard Rourke said...

Your humour cleverly accentuates Pelosi's selfish and ridiculous NIMBY. The fact that America has to bribe other countries to house the GITMO terrorists is an embarrassing disgrace.

Leslie Sacks said...


I agree with much of what you say except that once these prisoners are on American shores the passionate ACLU lawyers will agitate for their prosecution and ultimate release (as evidence is often inconclusive in these ambiguous battlefield circumstances.

Many thanks for your thoughts.